Professional Storyteller

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Things You Will Never Hear a Storyteller Say

Just thought of some of these the other day. Wanted to run them by you guys. If you have any additions, please send them to me.

Well, there's five minutes left in my set, but I'm done.

I would tell the ending, but the guy in the back is saying my time's up.

No, I don't care what temperature my water is.

I wish they would go over those housekeeping rules one more time.

No, it really happened...ask Lepp, he was there.

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Comment by Vernon L. Cox on June 20, 2008 at 10:07pm
"Sure the drums at the percussion both will attract children to my story place. How thoughtful of the fair committee to place me there"

Right along with
" Sure why not feed the children first and I would be honored to tell them tales while they wait to sit on Santa's Lap. Yeah the clown's ballon animals will not distract me at all I am a professional"

We all have lived that one
Learnin' Vernon
Comment by Granny Sue on April 8, 2008 at 7:15am
Here's one: "It's fine if parents and teachers want to sit in the back and talk."
or
"Leave me here alone with 200 kids so their teachers can take a break? No problem."
or
"I would love to drive 200 miles to your venue to perform as a volunteer. What did you say the name of your organization is?"
or
"I'm so good I don't need to practice."
or
"I know it all. There's nothing left for me to learn."
or
"I've never, ever forgotten a line (or a part) of a story while I was telling it."

Geez, this list could get really, really long.
Comment by Don 'Buck P' Creacy on April 4, 2008 at 9:38pm
I would rather dance Tango with Dianne that hear stories..... wait a minute.. maybe not
Comment by Sean Buvala on April 4, 2008 at 8:02pm
::::OMG::::::
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:54pm
"Sean Buvala break dances better than he tells stories..."
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:54pm
"Actually, I'd rather dance tango with Buck than tell stories..."
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:52pm
"I started out making a 100 grand a year as a storyteller. Are you kidding?!"
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:48pm
"Are you serious?!!! You want to give me my OWN Disney/Nickelodeon TV show?!!!!"
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:47pm
"I am so excited about the action figure/Barbie doll they are making of me! It's predicted to be the hottest toy this year for Christmas!"
Comment by Dianne de Las Casas, Founder on April 4, 2008 at 7:44pm
"Honey, I won't put any more than 12,000 miles on the car this year, I swear!"

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